Mary Richardson Daheim is a Seattle native with a communications degree from the University of Washington. Realizing at an early age that getting published in books with real covers might elude her for years, she worked on daily newspapers and in public relations to help avoid her creditors. She lives in her hometown in a century-old house not unlike Hillside Manor, except for the body count. Daheim is also the author of the Alpine mystery series.

This Old Souse

Avon Books

Chapter One

Judith McMonigle Flynn hurried to answer the front door,took one look at the hideous drooling green creature on theporch, and screamed. Panicking, she slammed the door andleaned against it. The thing was six feet tall, with gaping holesfor eyes, viscous green scales, and sharp yellow fangs. Judith wasso shaken that she couldn't move to call 911.

"Hey!" shouted a voice from outside. "Open up! It's me!Renie!"

Judith held a hand to her racing heart. Renie, along withother family members and friends, always used the back door.The front was reserved for guests at Hillside Manor. "Coz?" Judithcroaked, and slowly turned to open the door just a crack. There, next to the gruesome green creature, stood Serena Jones,more familiarly known to her family as Renie.

"Did SuperGerm scare you?" Renie asked, brown eyes wide.

"Good grief." Judith wilted against the doorframe. "Ithought I was going to have a heart attack. What is that awfulthing?"

"I guess I shouldn't have stood behind it," Renie said, lookingapologetic. "I would've gone to the back door, but this guyis kind of awkward to carry around." She gave the creature apat on one of its long, scaly arms. "It's just a cutout. I created itfor the county board of health's antigerm campaign. GarthDoyle made this model in his studio. The county will putposters of SuperGerm in all public restrooms to remind peopleto wash up."

"I'm about washed-up after that," Judith said, regainingsome of her aplomb. "How about getting that thing off the frontporch? It's not good advertising for a B&B."

"Hmm." Renie examined the cutout from stem to stern."Probably not. But don't you think it's good advertising for hygiene?"

"Yes, fine, super," Judith retorted. "Now put it back in yourcar before you come inside."

Renie, who was on the small side, struggled a bit as shecarted SuperGerm off to her car, which was parked in HillsideManor's driveway. Waiting on the porch, Judith surveyed thecul-de-sac. Just three days away from the start of summer, thespring shrubs, trees, and bulbs had faded away. The grass wasgreen, the leaves were glossy, and some of the roses were in fullbloom. But the sky was overcast, the temperature lingered in themidfifties, and there was a 40 percent chance of rain. It was, Judithknew, a typical June day in the Pacific Northwest.

"All gone," Renie announced, bounding up the steps. "Icould use some strong drink. You got any Pepsi?"

Judith nodded. "I just got back from Falstaff's Grocery. Ihave a full house tonight, so I had to fill the larder. Now thatschool's out, the B&B reservations are pouring in. I'm prettywell booked up through early August."

"That's great," Renie said, sitting down at the kitchen table."I'm not so busy. Summer's always a slow time in the graphic designbusiness. Everybody goes on vacation. Good for you, badfor me."

Judith took a can of Pepsi and a diet 7UP out of the refrigerator.Even after more than a year, she was still delighted with therenovations -- particularly in the kitchen -- that had been madefollowing a disastrous fire almost two years earlier.

"Say," Renie said as Judith joined her at the table, "have yougot time to take a little ride with me?"

Judith frowned at her cousin. "And with SuperGerm?"

"Well ... " Renie took a deep drink before finishing her reply."Yes, actually. I have to drop him off at Garth's. He needssome fine-tuning. SuperGerm, I mean, not Garth."

Judith looked skeptical. "And why would I want to helpchauffeur SuperGerm to Garth's studio?"

Renie reached into the sheep-shaped jar on the table andfilched three oatmeal raisin cookies. "Booyoommerthathouthnmoofle?" she inquired with her mouth full.

Judith was accustomed to her cousin's voracious appetite;she had also grown adept at translating Renie's food-marredspeech. "The house on Moonfleet Street? Sort of. Why?"

"Ahmobthethd."

"Oh." Judith nodded. "You've always been obsessed with thatplace, ever since you were a kid. What about it?"

Renie finally swallowed. "Garth lives in my old neighborhood,about four blocks from that house. As you may recall, it'sSpanish-style architecture, very unusual for this part of theworld."

"I recall." Judith turned as her cleaning woman, PhylissRackley, stomped into the kitchen carrying two black plasticbags. Upon seeing Renie, she stopped and glared.

"You," Phyliss breathed. "Don't start in on me with yourRomish ways."

"Bite me," Renie snapped.

Phyliss kneaded the plastic bags with her skinny fingers."False gods. Painted idols. Craven images."

"Funny," Renie remarked, about to pop another cookie intoher mouth. "I thought they were graven images."

"You're a blasphemer," Phyliss declared, pronouncing theword as if it were "blass-FEMUR." She turned to Judith andshook the black bags. "I don't like giving these to the St. Vincentde Paul. What's wrong with the Salvation Army?"

"Nothing," Judith replied, ignoring the long-standing religiousanimosity between Renie and Phyliss. "I'm the one who'sgiving that stuff away, and it'll go to whichever charity calls first.For now, I want those bags out on the back porch. They're clutteringup the second-floor hall."

With one last dark look for Renie, Phyliss proceeded downthe narrow hallway to the porch.

"The pope has spies everywhere," Renie called after thecleaning woman. "Better check the recycling bin, Phyliss."Judith shook her head. "I never bait Phyliss the way youdo," she admonished Renie. "I don't rile her. She's too good ather job."

"I didn't start it this time," Renie responded.

"You didn't need to," Judith said. "You've done it oftenenough in the past. Which," she went on as Phyliss returnedfrom the porch and headed down the basement stairs, "brings usback to the house on Moonfleet."