I could tell you that this book was hilarious and heartwarming, but that much has already been said so much better by so many others whose literary gifts extend beyond believing alliteration is terribly clever. So, instead, I’d like to tell you a story, which, having just finished “All Over The Place” minutes ago, seems like the only appropriate way to express my own feelings on the matter.
I was travelling to Portland for an event in honor of a friend whose parents had been brutally murdered. I realize that’s a terrible beginning to a story, but life has never read any of the hundreds of books telling it exactly how stories are supposed to be written (sadly, I have, and life has made the right choice on this particular point).
This friend and I were mutual friends with Geraldine and Rand. Geraldine is, to painfully oversimplify, my boss’s wife. This is a relationship that generally consists of nodding politely at Christmas parties and trying not to drink too much and embarrass yourself. I’ve since found that trying not to embarrass yourself in front of Geraldine is almost entirely antithetical to her nature, but that’s yet another story.
Somehow, it was decided that I should fly to Seattle (the only part of the next couple of days that made any practical sense, Seattle being our main office) and a group of us would drive up to Portland and return the next day. I pictured 3-4 of us in a sensible rental car, a solemn event, and a return the next morning to dutifully get as much work done as possible.
The sensible rental car turned out to be a cargo van – the exact kind of van that children are specifically instructed not to get into when approached by a stranger. While not by strangers, it would not be entirely inaccurate to say that I was abducted.
The next morning, instead of returning to the office, we stopped, in typical Portland fashion, for donuts and coffee on the way to breakfast. Being a native Midwesterner, this confuses me, as donuts and coffee are often the entire scope of our breakfast and do not lead immediately to another breakfast. Somewhere along the way, the three of us also became 11, including almost the entire executive team of our company.
All of this took an unacceptably long time, as eating all of your meals twice sometimes does, and so naturally we decided to make a quick stop at Geraldine’s mother’s house, which exists not so much on the way between Portland and Seattle as in a pocket dimension that may only be summoned under certain conditions beyond my comprehension. I suspect that the van was our TARDIS, and my abduction occurred across both space and time.
I only met Geraldine’s mother for the space of 15 minutes of normal, human time, in a house that was somehow a village, and at a time that was somehow perpetually both Halloween and Christmas. There were decorations for both and neither, and, without knowing why, that seemed right and proper. I met Melba the mannequin, who is inexplicably charming, and experienced a lifetime in a quarter-hour.
You may be wondering how any of this is helping you to decide whether to spend $15 on this book. You may also suspect that I’m simply trying to name-drop my limited time with Geraldine so that she remembers me when she inevitably becomes famous. You wouldn’t be completely wrong.
The point of all of this, though, is that this book is not simply hilarious and heartwarming. It is also – and I can say this with total confidence from a single road trip – absolutely and completely true. Not a single word is exaggerated, from hand grenades to unspeakable toilet incidents to desperately important boring clocks, and that makes it all the more magical.
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Reviews with images
Exceeds Expectations at the Start of a Glittering Career
I've known Geraldine for many years and have been a fan of her blog since it started. Thrilled as I was for her to get a proper book deal and be embarking on the rollercoaster ride that is being a published author, I wasn't ready for just how terrific this book is. Sure, I expected tea-spewing hilarity and the odd insanitary reference coupled with gushingly romantic and loving nods to her husband, but I wasn’t ready for the depth and poignancy of some of the writing and the profound effect that it had on me.Geraldine is in no way shallow, but some real magic has happened throughout the process of writing this book that has created the start of what I am sure will be a glittering career in the longer form of literature.They say everyone has a book in them, but I’m hoping Geraldine has twenty of them in her. All Over Place has been a smash hit in our house and in amongst our circle of friends, and we can’t wait for the follow-up!
Top reviews from other countries
Kim
Really enjoyed this book. A love story with some truly hilarious moments and a few tear-jerkers too
Reviewed in Australia on June 8, 2017