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Mel Robbins

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Stop Saying You're Fine: The No-BS Guide to Getting What You Want Kindle Edition

by Mel Robbins (Author) Format: Kindle Edition

4.6 1,237 ratings

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This hands-on guide from Mel Robbins, one of America’s top relationship experts and radio/tv personalities, addresses why over 100 million Americans secretly feel frustrated and bored with their lives and reveals what you can do about it.

Mel Robbins has spent her career teaching people how to push past their self-imposed limits to get what they truly desire. She has an in-depth understanding of the psychological and social factors that repeatedly hold you back, and more important, a unique set of tools for getting you where you want to be. In Stop Saying You’re Fine, she draws on neuroscientific research, interviews with countless everyday people, and ideas she’s tested in her own life to show what works and what doesn’t. The key, she explains, is understanding how your own brain works against you. Because evolution has biased your mental gears against taking action, what you need are techniques to outsmart yourself.

That may sound impossible, but Mel has created a remarkably effective method to help you do just that--and some of her discoveries will astonish you. By ignoring how you feel and seizing small moments of rich possibility--a process she calls “leaning in”--you can make tiny course directions add up to huge change. Among this book’s other topics: how everything can depend on not hitting the “snooze” button; the science of connecting with other people, what children can teach us about getting things done; and why five seconds is the maximum time you should wait before acting on a great idea.

Blending warmth, humor and unflinching honesty with up-to-the-minute science and hard-earned wisdom, Stop Saying You’re Fine moves beyond the platitudes and easy fixes offered in many self-help books. Mel’s insightswill actually help vault you to a better life, ensuring that the next time someone asks how you’re doing, you can truthfully answer, “Absolutely great.”

From the Publisher

The science of outsmarting yourself and eliminating self-imposed limits to get what you want

Gretchen Rubin says, “Mel Robbins gives funny and sharp advice.”

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Why is it so hard to do the things that we know will make us happier? In Stop Saying You’re Fine, Mel Robbins gives funny and sharp advice that's not only thought-provoking, but also action-provoking."
--Gretchen Rubin, author of the #1 New York Times bestseller The Happiness Project

"Mel Robbins is one of the most entertaining and compelling voices today. Read at your own risk. Mel will obliterate your excuses and leave you inspired, empowered and on fire."
--Darren Hardy, Publisher of Success magazine and bestselling author of The Compound Effect

“Mel Robbins has the guts to tell you why your brain is your biggest problem – but only if you listen to it. Here, she tells you how to power through and get what you want. I, for one, am listening.”
—Chris Brogan, President of Human Business Works and co-author of the New York Times bestseller TRUST AGENTS

"In STOP SAYING YOU’RE FINE, Mel Robbins draws on everything from cutting-edge research to countless real-world case studies to create a wonderful program for anyone who's ever wanted to stop wishing and start doing.”
—Marci Shimoff, New York Times bestselling author of LOVE FOR NO REASON and HAPPY FOR NO REASON

“Quit whining, stop saying you’re fine, and just snap out of it. Easier said than done, of course, which is why this roadmap is so remarkable. It’s jam-packed with concrete steps to pave the way.”
—Tory Johnson, Workplace Contributor for “Good Morning America” and CEO of Women for Hire

“STOP SAYING YOU’RE FINE nails a national problem: our tendency to try and be strong and stay the course--when it's the course we have to change, and strength is not working in our favor! In this no-nonsens...

About the Author

Mel Robbins gives advice to men and women across America on her daily syndicated radio show, The Mel Robbins Show, and is the host of an upcoming relationship series on the A&E Network. A Dartmouth-educated lawyer-turned-life-coach, she is also a columnist for Success magazine, a blogger, a relationship expert, and a working mom. Robbins lives with her family in Sherborn, Massachusetts.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

CHAPTER ONE

Stop Hitting the Snooze Button

Gain Power by Taking Action

There are some days when you just feel more powerful. You force yourself to get up early and break a sweat before everyone else wakes up. That sets the tone for the rest of your day. Your coffee tastes especially good, and the commute doesn't suck. At work, you go the extra mile on a project and come off looking like a hero. Afterward, you meet some friends whom you haven't seen in months, and have a couple of drinks on an outdoor deck in the cool summertime air. Someone hands you tickets he couldn't use. You embrace spontaneity and go see a great show. Afterward, you drive home by moonlight, have great sex, and drift off to sleep on a cloud.

We've all had days when we feel excited about our lives. We feel young, confident, and alive. Everything clicks. We feel like we're going somewhere, like we have momentum. We become more powerful versions of ourselves.

The powerful you is always there waiting and you can tap it anytime you want, if you know how. It's the part of you that loves discovery, curiosity, challenges, exercise, connecting with other people, checking off goals, taking action, heading somewhere, and talking out loud. It is a force inside you that wants to grow, move, and expand.

At the same time, there's an equal and opposite force that works inside you to hold you back. You were born with resistance. It's an inner, evolutionary bias to take the safe bet, the sure thing, the known path. Whenever you're feeling bored, bummed, or broken, resistance is winning in your life. Resistance loves surfing the Web, vegging out in front of the TV, sticking to routine, not picking up the phone, hitting snooze, avoiding confrontation, making excuses, rumination, and isolation.

Resistance will keep you in place; the powerful you will push you ahead. You will always feel tension between these two forces, between your current life and your desire for more. The direction you choose is entirely up to you. Every single day of your life, you have the choice to stay where you are or move your life in new directions. The question is, Will the powerful you awaken and start taking action, or will you wait just a little longer and delay the joy, satisfaction, and fulfillment you deserve?

Product details

ASIN ‏ : ‎ B004J4WLW8
Publisher ‏ : ‎ Harmony (May 10, 2011)
Publication date ‏ : ‎ May 10, 2011
Language ‏ : ‎ English
File size ‏ : ‎ 7214 KB
Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
Sticky notes ‏ : ‎ On Kindle Scribe
Print length ‏ : ‎ 274 pages

Best Sellers Rank: #474,118 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- #776 in Marriage & Long-Term Relationships
- #1,190 in Self-Esteem Self-Help
- #2,203 in Motivational Self-Help (Kindle Store)

Customer Reviews:
4.6 1,237 ratings

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Mel Robbins

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Mel Robbins is one of the leading voices in personal development and transformation and a New York Times Bestselling author. Her work includes "The High 5 Habit," "The 5 Second Rule," four #1 bestselling audiobooks, the #1 podcast on Audible, as well as signature online courses that have changed the lives of more than half a million students worldwide.

Her groundbreaking work on behavior change has been translated into 36 languages and is used by healthcare professionals, veterans’ organizations, and the world’s leading brands to inspire people to be more confident, effective, and fulfilled.

As one of the most widely booked and followed public speakers in the world, Mel coaches more than 60 million people online every month and videos featuring her work have more than a billion views online, including her TEDx talk, which is one of the most popular of all time.

There’s nothing Mel loves more than making a real difference in people’s lives by teaching them to believe in themselves and inspiring them to take the actions that will change their lives. Mel lives in New England with her husband of 25 years and their three kids, but she is and will always be a Midwesterner at heart.

You can find out more about Mel, her courses, booking her to speak at an event, or sign up for her newsletter list with 700k other subscribers at: www.melrobbins.com

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4.6 out of 5

1,237 global ratings

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Lemon Tree

I am leaving an Amazon review...

Reviewed in the United States on February 25, 2017

Verified Purchase

I saw the Tedx talk with Mel Robbins and loved it so bought her book a couple of days ago. How inspiring! She says to act quickly instead of second guessing (I am paraphrasing) and so I have been.

I thought, I want to leave an Amazon review for a product yesterday and did it. I have had an Amazon account for 11 years and have not left a review in all of that time although I shop here regularly. I always wanted to because I read so many reviews, and I wanted to contribute. However, I ignored the impulse to do it using excuses such as "what if my review sounds silly" or "who would care what I have to say"... etc. But I ignored it and started leaving reviews after all of these years! Why? Because I wanted to. And this book is about doing what you want to do!

It may seem like a small change (it's a big change for shy me!) but there will be many more I am certain. I will update this review soon. I am only 20 percent through the book and she already inspired a change in me. This is proof!

Thanks Mel!

Update 3-29-17

I finished the book shortly after leaving my review... wonderful book. I have read motivational books before but this is my favorite one because it has inspired me, (and not just for a couple of days after reading it)... and the inspiration has led to action and PROGRESS.

I have mapped out my goals for the year and figured out ways I can reach these goals by working on them 10-15 minutes per day or with a small check off list. I looked at my never-ending to do list and discovered I don't need to do most of those things- I want to accomplish things that are meaningful to me.

I get the negative voices all the time that say "I am too tired" or "I can't because it is too difficult" or "I can't because it won't work"... and I ignore them because those excuses will not help me reach my dreams.

A cool thing about reaching these goals is it may inspire others in my life who feel stuck. If I can do it, they may feel like they can, too. I want to do that. This book will help you do that.

330 people found this helpful

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Matt Kurtz

A great outline for how to get unstuck.

Reviewed in the United States on October 8, 2021

Verified Purchase

This is a great book about how to get unstuck in your life. Even when it seems like things are going "fine" in your life, there are areas where you are stuck in a rut. Mel outlines a simple, straightforward, set of actions you can take to help get those areas back to thriving. I just purchased her new book, the High 5 Habit, based off this and the 5 Second Rule. I love that she always has science to back up her concepts, so it's not just a lot of feel good ideas. It really works and there's a reason behind it.

4 people found this helpful

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Sharon

Just the kick in the butt I needed!

Reviewed in the United States on July 31, 2013

Verified Purchase

Mel Robbins' style is very direct and to the point...no mamby pamby sugar coating. She explains that it all boils down to powering through your doubts and fears to get what you really want. This book was very refreshing in that sense but if you're looking for a magic bullet or a quick fix, you're out of luck. She walks you through all the ways your brain is programmed to work against you and gives you steps to identify what it is you really want (and no it doesn't have to be some wild fantasy - unless that's what you really want). She also asks you to be honest about WHY you want it and she gives you license to be vain. So you want to get in shape to rub it in someone's face who rejected you? Great!! At least you're being honest and that's really the key. If you can't articulate why you want something with some real emotion then you're not going to kick yourself in the butt to get it.

I originally borrowed this book from my local library and after reading it I knew I had to buy it so I could mark up all the "ah-ha" moments she provides. I would suggest you look her up on YouTube TED talks as well...she's very engaging.

8 people found this helpful

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Amazon Customer

If you follow even just a few of the steps in this book, you will feel more powerful in your day to day life.

Reviewed in the United States on March 15, 2018

Verified Purchase

This book was one of the most helpful self-help /coaching books I have ever read! It made a huge impression on me. It taught me to live powerfully and to recognize when I feel stuck and to take action.

I was so moved by this book and found the steps to be simple and change for the better to be achievable. Mel Robbins breaks down life changing steps into small pieces. And it is written in simple very direct language that is comfortable to read and take in.

I am actually re-reading the book. I found that I was noticing that stuck feeling in my life again and decided that I needed to re-visit this book. I am getting even more out of it this time. And, just like the first time, I feel better and more empowered.

20 people found this helpful

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Heidi S Wolff

Great Book

Reviewed in the United States on November 5, 2017

Verified Purchase

This book gives the reader ways, strategies, and tasks to help them realize that they may be stuck in areas of their life. It could be in their career, relationships, etc. The ways, strategies, and tasks are things that everyone can do in order to change their life and the different situations that they experience on a daily basis for the better. The book makes the reader stop, ask themselves, and think why they have not taken ownership of the situations that they face, the outcome of those situations, and ultimately, why they haven’t taken ownership of their life yet. We are capable of controlling our own destiny and where we end up in our life. We just have to put in the effort and the work for the results that we want.

8 people found this helpful

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Amazon Customer

killer good book, as would be expected by anything from ...

Reviewed in Canada on June 9, 2018

Verified Purchase

Oh man, killer good book, as would be expected by anything from Mel Robbins. Get it and change your life!

Kindle Customer

Second great book again by mel robbins

Reviewed in India on January 17, 2018

Verified Purchase

Mel Robbins books are really fasinating and life changing.the uniqueness of this book os it will empower you with the tools to achieve worthful in your life.

2 people found this helpful

Cliente Amazon

Me encanta

Reviewed in Spain on March 23, 2018

Verified Purchase

Me encanta este libro!es muy fácil para leer y hay consejos también. Love it. She is a good woman !

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Cliente de Amazon

Inmediately life changing

Reviewed in Mexico on March 27, 2017

Verified Purchase

Unless you simply don't do what the book tells you to do, this simple, straightforward text will positively affect your everyday life with practical tools.

One person found this helpful

Karine A.

Helped me a lot

Reviewed in France on August 24, 2016

Verified Purchase

I loved this book , because it helped me understand how my brain works and how to "trick" it to get things done and to generally change things in life. I feel more relaxed now knowing nothing was wrong with me and that I can progress :)

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